Archive for the 'humor' Category

03
Mar
09

Drugs are bad…for cats too

Apparently, this man didn’t get the memo. He stuffed his cat into a homemade bong in an attempt to get it to calm down.

Reports have the cat, named Shadow, eating all of the man’s Doritoes and Ho Hos while its owner made bail.

02
Mar
09

The Vast Right-Wing conspiracy begins

They must be signing the first bailout

They must be signing the first bailout

16
Feb
09

They even hate our beverages…

Whats next? Cereal? Toast? This must be stopped...

What's next? Cereal? Toast? This must be stopped...

07
Feb
09

The Left’s post-coital snooze

My friend kernunos asked me the other day: Where are the Moonbats? Where are the militant liberals ranting silliness? They seem to have lost their spunk. They just don’t want to play in the blogoshere anymore. I’ve noticed the same phenomena. But I have a theory, and here it is:

First, we need a short sex education class so that people easily understand what my theory entails.

Did you know that before a male horse mates, it can take four people just to control the horny animal while trying to get him to mate? After the stallion’s had his way with the mare, the poor boy can barely stand by himself and can be led away to beddy-buys by a small, adoring child.

And of course, in the laundry list of women’s complaints about men, is that they always want to go to sleep after sex. Guess what, ladies. It’s that weird thing called….BIOLOGY! Yes, we leave the toilet seat up, love video games and fall asleep after sex. That’s just the way it is. See, it’s a hormone. Everything, it seems can be blamed on hormones. Women like to bitch because of them and men want sex because of testosterone (Ok, I’m oversimplifying here. Testosterone levels are only part of the equation when it comes to libido), and we fall asleep afterwards because of a hormone called prolactin. Ain’t nothin’ we can do about it. The hormone introduces a wait period before a man can perform again, and also makes him sleepy. Animals injected with prolactin, immediately become tired.

Biology class is over, so you can quit the giggling and whispering in the back of the class.

Your lesson learned may have a political equivalent. Over the last two years, the media, far-left liberals, women of every hue and political affiliation have been engaged in a giant mega-orgy with Obama. The titanic debauch–which encompassed the whole world–even had all of Europe feeling the earth move. It culminated in a budget-shattering orgasm on Obama’s inauguration day. Feeling satiated, the Leftists, Moonbats, “Socialist-Democrats”, Progressives, Libertines and even Keith Olbermann have rolled over and commenced a good snooze.

But it’s only a matter of time ’til they’re ready to climb back in the saddle. They’re  a lustful bunch. The mating cycle of the Moonbat makes bunnies look like downright prudes. They’ll be back, even more libidinous than before, demanding people’s rights to marry animals or some such thing.

04
Feb
09

Could Moonbats soon be endangered?

Hug a terrorist today!!

Hug a terrorist today!!

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090204/ap_on_re_us/bat_die_off;_ylt=AuVCYGY1tzmaQLZ2cIDHJyQazJV4

26
Jan
09

The power of Rainbows!

     Captain Planet used the power of the rainbow to save us from horrible industry! Hoorayyy!                                                                    

21
Jan
09

Get some

Roger Alpha Niner. I have in my sights. Confirming order to elliminate target

Roger Alpha Niner. I have in my sights. Confirming order to elliminate target

Can we hire this guy to find Bin Laden?




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