13
Jul
08

Considerations on relationships

Yesterday I was at the mall and stopped into the bookstore. One of the new releases is a book by Oliver North documenting the Iraq War and his visits there. It’s a hard-cover book with many high-quality photos.

As I flipped through the pages, one photo struck me, reminding me of others like it that I’ve seen. It showed a soldier sitting on his couch with his beautiful wife. The soldier had suffered severe burns from an explosion while on deployment. His mouth appeared stretched to a permanent smile and his skin was pink and mottled. His arms too had suffered severe damage; scaly and reddened.

At first I felt sad for the soldier. I thought of the numerous times that he must have heard how dangerous his tour would be, all of the stories he’d heard about other soldiers being killed or maimed. What did he think of his chances when he was deployed? When the heat and force of that explosion rocked his convoy or foot patrol, what went though his mind as the dust settled and the screams of his comrades slowly gathered into coherant voices.

But that sadness was replaced by a greater one. As I stared at the photo, the juxtaposition of the burned soldier and the very pretty wife hit me. She was smiling an unforced smile and she sat very close to her husband, holding his arm and looking very comfortable.

She loved her husband despite his viscious injuries and freightening appearance.

It saddened me, because it now seems second nature for me to assume people won’t stay together. People will split apart because of the slightest problems, or because they think they can do better–their own vanities grabbing them and carrying them down terrible roads.

But here was a couple who had stayed together, through an ordeal which would shake anyone. Yes, they may split in the future, but as I said, the woman’s body language showed nothing but love for her husband.

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5 Responses to “Considerations on relationships”


  1. July 13, 2008 at 5:30 pm

    This post is really touching. I’m always stunned at some people’s capacity to love without conditions. It’s rare I think, but it is so encouraging to know that it exists….somewhere…for someone.

  2. July 14, 2008 at 8:49 pm

    Sadly, there are numerous cases of marriages failing because one person was injured or maimed…or simply packed on a few too many pounds.

    Why people form relationships, why they last and why they fail are all fascinating matters.

    But, it is great that that marriage is staying together. That sort of loyalty is not common.

  3. July 14, 2008 at 9:35 pm

    I agree with you. Although, the cynic in me wonders how happy they will be in ten years…

  4. 4 Mike Rozos
    July 22, 2008 at 3:31 am

    It’s like that bell they have at Navy BUDS. Ring it when you want to quit, anytime you feel like it. If you never want to quit, you never ring the bell.

    That’s a successful marriage, I think. The two trainees who know they will never ring the quitters bell.

    Let’s hope they never quit.

  5. August 8, 2011 at 9:57 pm

    I still love my ex boyfriend so now what?


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